Talkin' Toledo

In northern Ohio, you can find a certain dialect spoken among what's left of the Furry crowd there. Here's a random sampling of some of the interesting words and phrases you may encounter.

Wide (adj) That which extends past the expectations of Northern Ohio. To live beyond the norm; to succeed greatly; to be much too good for one's surroundings. (example) "Wow, look at that Geo Tracker with the ground effects! If only I could live that wide!"
Snug (verb) To lend or borrow without the intention of ever getting back or returning. (example) "Say, man, can ya snug me a couple bucks for a soft taco? I'm flat outta cash."
Noisepad (noun) A car with bass so heavy that people in the car next to your's ears bleed. (example) "Hmmmdamn! Is there a T-Rex stompin' around here, or is someone's noisepad 'a thumpin'?"
fEk (noun) A unit of measure equal to 5'7" and/or 116-118 lbs. (example) "I think we have room in the car for the inflatable whale.. my trunk can hold about 9 fEks."
Minute (noun) A monetary unit based on one minute of Sprint long distance (currently one dime) (example) "Say, Simon, snug me a couple dozen minutes. I wanna play Tekken 3"
Denny's (noun) A place you don't want to eat at, but everywhere else is closed. (Example) "Damn! Denny's again."
Dumpster-Diving (noun) A recreational pasttime in Northern Ohio where particpants root through dumpsters in search of goodies thrown out. (example) "Yeah, Skates ain't bad at dumpster diving, but he's no fEk"
FFA (noun; abbr; "Future Farmer of America") Someone who looks hopelessly stuck in Ohio. (example) "Let's face it, I'm FFA material. Damn."
Lucky Bastard (noun) Someone who actually left Ohio, as in for good. (see also "Traitor to the Plow") (example) Lupinous, that lucky bastard, is running the Bay Bridge marathon next week."

I hope you've learned a little about Ohio's colorful lingo, and come by for a visit next time you're driving through to a state you *really* want to go to.

-Kiyote